What does washing down 400mg of ibuprofen with a Yakult Light say about my attitude to health?

Got back to London after a few days up north to celebrate my Gran's 90th birthday (she spent the weekend looking alternatively thrilled then bewildered).

Within moments of my arrival in the capital city, I was approached by a shall we say dapper man, who asked if I'd been at the Monet art conference (no) and was I an art historian (no). I'm not sure why he continued with the second question after my negative first answer.

The next person I saw was a man evacuating the contents of his left nostril on the pavement, by holding his right nostril then blowing hard.

If you're tired of London?

When a restaurant such as The Ivy claims that it hasn't changed in 30 years, this is no doubt considered to be a very good thing. Not so La Ballerina on Bow Street, but a plie from The Royal Opera House. Featuring Liszt wearing white tinsel, 100 bobbing ballerinas hanging from the ceiling and louvered grey and pink doors, we chomped our way through our 'Italian' food and a bottle of Prosecco. The door to the loo like something from 'The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe', was through a dull grey slatted door. I lost my way, fearing I may never return.

Meanwhile, the rest of London seemed to be getting on quite well with Christmas. For the first time in a few I walked through Covent Garden's Apple Market to pause briefly at the brick-tossing man, before heading south to the Strand at The Coal Hole. Chicago was brightly lit opposite, with queues already building. Villers Street by then was packed with middle-aged men in paper hats, swaying gently, blaming it on the Thames tide no doubt.

A quick cassoulet of objets.

Courtesy of CBBC and a day off:
"I've got wind, can you give me something for it?"
"A kite."


Courtesy of a randim overhearing:
"Yeah, so I thought my vacuum cleaner wasn't working, it wasn't sucking up any more, so I was going to throw it away. And then, yeah, I called my dad and he said wait a bit, sit down, and he opened it up yeah, took out the bag and put a new one in and it works again!"

Oh hurrah, a nice easy Scrabble to play online.